Thursday, May 5, 2011

"Can Someone Grab A First-Aid Kit?"

Being I am back home, I decided to join a softball team for the summer.  I have played softball my whole life and had given it up for a couple years being away for college.  But I'm back and it feels so good to play!  Last week was a very interesting start to the season.
My story begins here....

Every Friday night we play double headers and get drunk.  Its pretty fun.  I was a little nervous to play because I hadn't thrown a ball in like two years.  In reality, I outplayed myself.  I wasn't doing too bad.  We lost our first game because we couldn't get our bats going but we did really well in the field.  Second game we switched fields and some of us were feeling really good.  I was second batter up and we were feeling great about this second game.  I walk up to the plate...swinnnggg....hiittt. "FOUL BALL".  In this league you are only allowed one curiosity foul.  I knew I had to hit this one, and for it to go somewhere or I was heading for an out.  This pitch was low and had a weird spin on it...so I really dug for it...swinging really low to try and at least pop it up and follow through like I'm golfing.  I hear it hit the bat and then I had no idea where it went... I was waiting for the call and heard nothing. I looked back and the umpire is laying on the ground with his hand over his face and blood everywhere.  Little ole me split his lip open and moved his tooth.  It looked pretty nasty.  I instantly drop the bat and ask if he was OK and don't get an answer. I then yell "Can someone grab a first aid kit?"... no one moves.  I look up at everyone just standing and staring and yell again, but even louder and a little more intimidating, "CAN SOMEONE PLEASSEEE GRAB A FIRST AID KIT?"  Everyone hustles around.  We get him all situated and off the Emergency Room he goes.  Because of me. 

The verdict of the hit was...well there was no verdict.  Half the people I talked to said the bat hit him in the face and the other half said the ball hit him.  Either way I sent an umpire to the emergency room.  I screwed up someones face.  I felt so bad. 

So as he walked away to go to the doctor, I cracked open a beer and asked "Does that count as an out or do I get to try again?"

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